The Legacy You Leave
Updated: Apr 12, 2019
A good person leaves an inheritance for their children’s children, but a sinner’s wealth is stored up for the righteous.
Proverbs 13:22
I recently read an article on CNBC.com about the $30 trillion inheritance children of Baby Boomers should forget about receiving. Research has shown that many of our parents and grandparents are living longer and some are working while spending the money they earn. Leaving some of the younger generations questioning their benefactor status.
Today children possess more than we ever did. In addition to toys and other excessive material things, they have devices that cost a couple of month's car notes. And as they get a little older, some even have cars that have notes paid by parents costing more than their educations. Of course all children do not fit into this category, which is an example that we all can survive without the materialistic luxuries of today.
My Mother Taught Me Everything Except How to Live Without Her
Being human is both complicated and amazing at the same time. As a child you cling to sources of protection, affection, and love, and you long for them to forever be near you. As a parent you find yourself holding on to clinginess, becoming a protector, embracing affection, and simply in love. You long for a child that will want you to be present even as you age.
I can't recall the amount of times I heard my mother say that, "I need you to be more independent like your sister." I love both of my siblings dearly, no jealousy at all, but I always wanted to understand what independence meant to my mother. I was the baby of the family, and I carried the stereotypical baby of the family traits along with me. All three of us were spoiled within reason. As a child I would often have dreams about my parents passing away. I don't know why. I remember occasional conversations about my mother's mother who was killed in a car accident when my mother was four, but I don't know if these talks had anything to do with my dreams. To be truthful, it was one of my biggest fears. Not long before she was diagnosed with cancer, I had a dream that my mother passed away. I immediately called my mother, we talked about what my dreams could've meant, and hoped that her stomach issues were not due to anything terminal. I just chalked it up to me needing to become more independent. How I wish that were the case. Well I wish it was only about independence and not her passing away. During the Summer, while I was in Houston for college, she had exploratory surgery. My family made it seem like everything was ok, so I was excited about my trip to Dallas to see her, because I just knew that our faithful prayers had been answered. When we entered the garage of the hospital, my father broke the news to me, "The cancer is still there, I need you to be strong." Eighteen years later I still get teary eyed, when I think about that moment. I broke into a million little fragile pieces trying to pull myself together to walk into the room to see my mother. I hugged her and tried my best to pretend as though everything was alright, but as my mother said, she knew her baby and she was right, I was completely broken. The next few months were a struggle, while she was encouraged by her children’s strength, we were encouraged by her Spiritual insight and resilience. I usually talked to my mother on the phone daily, she was just starting to become my best friend and in the Fall, she was gone. There were so many events I wish we could have shared together, my graduation from graduate school, my wedding, the birth of our children. All moments shared without her being physically present, but there is something that she shared with me before I could even talk, that kept me balanced, that brought peace to a rumbling storm building up in my body, and that is the knowledge of Christ. While it may have seemed like there were many more things my mother had in her arsenal to teach me, she was developing my independence, especially in her death, by teaching me the greatest love of all, to have a relationship with Christ for myself. When they were able to, my parents sent us not just to private school but to Christian school, I went the longest out of the three. She taught Sunday School, worked with the youth in and out of church, she not only told us about Christ and made sure we had resources in our home to read about Him on our level, she also exemplified what living for Christ looked like, by going to church, serving others, and through overall faith, hope, and love.
Walking through a store yesterday I heard a song called "Most People are Good," part of the chorus says "Most mammas ought to qualify for sainthood." I think most people would like to think their parents, or more likely, their mothers are prime candidates for most significant honors. After all there are so many great achievements and sacrifices you can link directly to this accomplishment. Most of what our parents give us is a result of the unconditional love parents have for their children. Through unconditional love, children are taught by example the intensity of the love that parents have for them, their ability to provide for them no matter what they do, their desire and ability to encourage them to do better, and their showing affection are qualities that children not only feel but when shown correctly, they can model.
I Love You More
When we were dating, my husband introduced me to a song by a group called Commissioned, the song was called "More Than I." I grew to love this song, it was about a man loving a woman the best he could, but he wanted her to know that God loves her more than he ever could.
While being a parent has been a roller coaster ride of emotion, the days our children were dedicated to God and their baptism have been the best days of my life, those days have been emotional but so meaningful. During those events we were preparing them to take their own journeys with Christ. Materialistically I have nothing of real substance to leave our children and definitely not our grandchildren, but I have a legacy to give them not made by man's hands. When my mother passed away, we did benefit from some things, but there is only ONE from which I gained, peace, comfort, strength, love, wisdom, knowledge, and learned that freedom comes from my dependence on Him. He saved me from myself when paths of destruction circled about and He kept me, when I was low.
As a kid I loved the song “If I Could,” by Nancy Wilson and later sung by Regina Belle. Now that I am an adult and a parent, the song has an even greater meaning. Even as a child I could feel my mother‘s thoughts through the song, but I also knew then, that she was preparing me for a day when she would not be able to “wipe the sadness from my eyes, but she would if she could.” The song goes on to say, “I would teach you all the things I never learned.” I’m so grateful to say that she taught me the most important thing I will ever learn in life, the love of God The Father Who loves us more than we could ever imagine.
In I Chronicles 28:9 David told Solomon, "As for you, my son Solomon, know the God of your father, and serve Him with a loyal heart and with a willing mind; for the Lord searches all hearts and understands all the intent of the thoughts. If you seek Him, He will be found by you; but if you forsake Him, He will cast you off forever.” Are our children prepared for life on their own? Are they developing their own relationship with the Lord and not depending solely on the world to tell them who to follow? Let's teach our children how to live a life of righteousness that will last long after we are gone, by leaving them an eternal legacy in knowing and living for Christ.
Happy Anniversary of your Birth Mamma♥️4.12.1945
